I REFUSE TO SINK!

I saw a post today on Facebook ™ that simply said “I Refuse to Sink” and as I pondered that phrase I realized that God must have known I needed to hear that simple sentence.  How is it that some people just cruise through life without a care in the world and things always seem to go well for them?   While others of us are going through life in a boat that is constantly poked with holes…sinking us deeper and deeper into despair.

I recalled the story of Peter as he was called by Jesus to step out of the boat and walk towards Him.  Walk on water?  Peter must have thought that was insane because no man can walk on water.  But once he stopped thinking about what he could not do and started thinking about what his God could do it changed his perspective.  He took that brave step out of the boat and stepped upon the water yet Peter was still so afraid.  Peter slowly began to take one step then another then another as he made his way towards Jesus, keeping his eyes on his Master at all times.  Then suddenly Peter began to sink “ And immediately Jesus stretched out His hand and caught him, and said to him, “O ye of little faith, why did you doubt?” (Matthew 14:31)

You see once Peter took his eyes off Jesus and started relying on his own abilities he began to sink immediately.  Psalms 69:14 says “Deliver me from the mire and do not let me sink; May I be delivered from my foes and from the deep waters.”  The same thing happens with us when we take our eyes off Him.  But how do you keep your focus and keep your faith in the midst of disaster, despair, stress and sorrow?  It’s hard I know…I am there right now and have been there many times before.  But what I have learned is that God ALWAYS brings me through it.  Never as quickly as we would hope most of the time but never the less we make it through.

So today I have decided that I REFUSE TO SINK!!!  I will not let Satan or any person or circumstance sink me to the level that Satan wants me to be.  I will keep my eyes on my Master and know that the “name of the Lord is my strong fortress, the Godly run to him and are safe.” (Proverbs 18:10)  Its going to be tough but “I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength”  (Philippians 4:13).

Keep the faith family and friends as this world wants you to sink….be strong and keep looking towards our Savior!!!

Love in Christ,

Heidi

Into My Dad’s World…

I know you in my heart but not in my mind is how my dad must feel. It is so heart breaking to see him slowly slip away mentally while he still looks the same on the outside. You want so much for that person you knew to return from the deep and dark world that their disease has sent them to. The love you feel for them is the same but is theirs the same for you? How can he love me? He doesn’t even know my name. Hatred and anger towards me occur more and more and the saying “you always hurt the ones you love” becomes truer than ever. So why so much hate and anger you wonder? Well it’s all part of this horrible disease they call Alzheimer’s. Most patients experience this and it can be triggered by an event or just for no reason at all.

It’s hard reversing roles and now becoming the parent of your parent so to speak. Decisions that he use to make for himself are no longer possible so it falls on me. If only he would understand that any decision I make is for his own good and not to hurt him. That alone would be a blessing. But everything I do seems to anger him and the hurt grows deeper and deeper as I continue to love the man who once knew he loved me.

Not only is dad experiencing anger but so am I. Anger at this disease that not only took my grandfather but is now taking my dad too. Anger that I know of many others suffering from this disease that has no cure only a death sentence. I don’t like feeling this way and pray to God daily to take this pain away and give me the peace I need to make it through this painful process.

Matthew 11:28-30 says:
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you
rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light

As an only child losing my mom and now slowly loosing my dad is so hard. But what’s even harder is having been replaced by others in his life over the years; it feels like he chose to forget me even when he wasn’t sick. Putting others ahead of me, keeping me in the dark and leaving me out of the picture was his way. Unlike my mom who included me in everything and wanted no more than for me to always be in the picture. I will go to my grave never knowing why he felt that way about me.

But now he needs me and so I come to his aid like a good daughter should. Forgiving him for hurting me all throughout the years gone by and forgiving him for hurting me each time his anger flares yesterday, today and again tomorrow. I will never know what it is like to have that father/daughter relationship I’ve always wanted. But I will not let him down, now or ever. I will help him and love him as he slips further and further away from us on his journey into darkness until he sees the light of his eternal home.

For everything there is a season,
a time for every activity under heaven.
A time to be born and a time to die.
A time to plant and a time to harvest.
A time to kill and a time to heal.
A time to tear down and a time to build up.
A time to cry and a time to laugh.
A time to grieve and a time to dance.
A time to scatter stones and a time to gather stones.
A time to embrace and a time to turn away.
A time to search and a time to quit searching.
A time to keep and a time to throw away.
A time to tear and a time to mend.
A time to be quiet and a time to speak.
A time to love and a time to hate.
A time for war and a time for peace. — Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 (NLT)

I pray that anyone reading this post and who has or is experienced the same sadness will respond so we can share with each other.  Supporting caregivers is crucial.

Love in Christ,

Heidi

SCARS…

Have you ever really thought about how many scars you have? Webster’s defines a scar as “a mark left by a healed wound”. But is that wound ever truly healed?  Even our most distant memories from childhood can bring back wounds that we suffered many years ago. Wounds of our teen years are even more vivid in our minds and then there are the wounds of our adult years that are ever-present in our thoughts. Our wounds can be self-inflicted as well as inflicted by others. Some or all of these wounds may have healed but the scars will always remain. Now the question is, do you let the scars determine how you live your life today?

Imagine someone who has been in a terrible accident and has burn marks all over his face. These scars will be a permanent visible and mental reminder to him of the suffering that occurred when he was burned. But we do not have to let our scars be a constant reminder of our wounds however each scar does tell a story. A story of pain and suffering most of the time but that scar can turn into recovery if you believe in the healing power of Jesus Christ.
Recently I watched the movie about the life of Rich Mullins a very famous Christian song writer who suffered abuse as a child and led a reckless life of alcoholism as an adult while writing the most beautiful Christian songs. Isn’t that hard to believe? I sure was in shock to find that out. He said “It’s not gonna matter if you have a few scars. It will matter if you didn’t live.” Now maybe I don’t exactly know what he meant by that statement but I believe he was saying that yes we all have scars, we have all been wounded and hurt but don’t let that stop you from living. Everyone, even people with the deepest and darkest scars of abuse, addiction, adultery, committing serious crimes, etc. all have a chance for full recovery, getting past the days of misery and on to better days on earth and an eternity in heaven.

Rich Mullins also said, “Never forget what Jesus did for you. Never take lightly what it cost Him. And never assume that if it cost Him His very life, that it won’t also cost you yours.” Not meaning that you must physically die but allowing one’s current self to die so that the new you can be born of the Holy Spirit…a spiritual rebirth not physical.

2 Corinthians 5:17 (NIV) says  “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come, The old has gone, the new is here!”
Let go of those scars that are stopping you from living and from letting the old you die away. Jesus is waiting for each of us to make that choice. Do you continue to be in pain? Or do you turn to Him, believe in Him, confess of your sins and accept Him as your Lord and Savior? When that happens the old you is gone and the new you is here. Old wounds are totally healed and your scars are no longer significant in any way. At this point in your life the best is yet to come.  Now don’t think you will not suffer any new wounds or have any new scars but now you have the power of Holy Spirit living in you to help you through.  Praise the Lord!!

Times Sure Are Changing

Hello Friends,

In the wake of yet another American tragedy it is easy for some people to begin questioning God or even the existence thereof.   I know your minds today are full of questions about WHY all these terrible things continue to happen to our country.   Within the last 10 years alone I can recall far too many tragedies and natural disasters within our country and even within our own hometowns. Times sure are changing it seems.

Yet I live each day knowing that even though I cannot control what happens around me I have the peace of knowing God loves me and I know where I will go when my life on earth is over.  You see we are not promised a tomorrow, we’re not even promised the next minute…so are you ready?  If your life ended today are you sure where you are going?  Really SURE?  It’s a scary question and one most people don’t want to think about because we as humans try to avoid the DEATH word, but its reality and we all must face the fact that our days are numbered.  With one tragedy after another it is even more of a wake up call for us all.  So stop and think about it…if you had been at the Boston Marathon on Monday or sitting in the classroom at Virginia Tech on April 16, 2007 and were suddenly killed by a violent act…where would you be right now?  If you don’t know, it’s time to make a change in your life TODAY. 

Jesus tells us in John 16:33 “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” In this verse He is preparing the disciples for his departure to heaven but promises He will come again but in the meantime there will be much tribulation in the world.  You see… He warned us!

Cross references:

1. John 16:33 : S Jn 14:27
2. John 16:33 : Jn 15:18-21
3. John 16:33 : Ro 8:37; 1Jn 4:4; 5:4; Rev 2:7, 11, 17, 26; 3:5, 12, 21; 21:7

Since Monday I had been searching blogs to see what other Christians have to say about the tragedy’s we are facing in our world today.  I came across this blog written by Dan King aka Bible Dude.  It totally says what I think will answer a lot of your questions.  Let me know what you think.

The Truth about Tragedy

By:  Dan King   bibledude.net

Why is there so much tragedy in the world today? Between terrorist attacks, natural disasters, and even personal tragedies like a loved one being diagnosed with a terminal cancer, we seem to regularly face adversity and tragedy. You cannot turn on the news without hearing about a tragic murder or some pedophile who taunts society with their ability to get away with what they do. So much evil and tragedy in our world has an even worse side effect. It causes people to question where God is, and they end up being fearful.

It is a shame when people have to be concerned about their children playing in front of their own homes because they don’t know who is watching. This mentality causes people to have their kids play inside and shut out the rest of the world. This fear of what is happening in the world around us is resulting in a society that is very individualistic, and has little sense of community.

First let’s deal with this reaction of questioning where God is at in all of this. When tragedy strikes it is easy to question God, and ask questions like, “if God loves me, then how could He let this happen to me?” or “couldn’t God stop that terrorist from flying that plane into that building?’.

The truth is that the God that created the universe certainly could stop someone from doing something evil. He could also stop something that could shorten your life from ever taking root in your body. But much of what we consider tragic is often the result of human choices. The terrorist is also a God-created, human being who is making a choice to give in to his hate for other people. Even many medical conditions are the result of human decisions as well. For example, the rise in Diabetes (my own son is a Type 1 Diabetic) is likely the result of generations of poor eating habits (this is my opinion, not a medical fact). The bottom line is that we are allowed to make decisions on our own, and we must live with the consequences.

But, what about the people that do evil things? Can’t God stop them? If He did, then it would require the removal of their free will. God has given each of us a free will. Why? Our love means more to Him if it is something that we choose to do than something that we are forced to do. This free will is an incredible gift, but also a great responsibility. We all, and this includes the terrorist, get to decide our own fates. If God were to take away the free will of the terrorist, then He’d have to take away your free will as well, and that is not the type of humanity that He desired.

So, evil and tragedy exists, and short of removing our free will, there is nothing that God can do to change that. Because that doesn’t change anything about the world that we live in, then how do we deal with this whole fear issue? I believe that there are three things in particular that we can all do to deal with this whole issue of living in fear…

Think – God gave us brains and tells us to use them. So the first thing that we need to do is to be smart about what we do. Don’t put yourself into compromising situations. Use wisdom to help you discern what is okay and not okay. But more than that use your mind to find creative solutions. Are you worried about your kids playing in the street in front of your house? Then get to know your neighbors by having a block party. The point is to be smart about how you respond to the world.

Change – We are commanded to “fear not.” So living in fear is a sin, and if you live in fear you should repent. Just remember that repentance is not as much about being sorry for what you did as it is about changing your behavior.

Hope – Christians need to think more long-term. We have a hope and a future. We may have to experience tragedy while we are here in this life, but we have something greater to look forward to.

So may you have the peace that surpasses all understanding, and overcome the fearful life. Embrace life, engage the world, and through your example be a great witness for Him.

Have a blessed week everyone!!

Love in Christ,

Heidi